not_my_normal

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Relax, Limewire, I'll get the RIAA off your back... by agressivin funny

[–]not_my_normal 0 points1 point ago

That's seventy three quadrillion dollars. That check would totally bounce.

What did school teach you that was blatantly false once you researched it on the Internet? by peetssin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 0 points1 point ago

My middle school, expectedly, sucked at history.

But my high school was remarkably good, both because we used college books, and because the classes were discussion based instead of lecture based. Of course, enough kids started to complain about the difficulty that by the time I left, they had started transitioning into more traditional high school history lessons.

What did school teach you that was blatantly false once you researched it on the Internet? by peetssin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 0 points1 point ago

And that is why I said no to IB, even though I got in.

I have $60 dollars to feed ~30 college students in 5.5 hours. Any ideas what I should make? by not_my_normalin Cooking

[–]not_my_normal[S] 1 point2 points ago

I'm thinking shepherd's pie. It's a hall favorite that hasn't been made recently.

My friend came out to his family today, I think they had an inkling. by reddit0rialin funny

[–]not_my_normal 0 points1 point ago

Need current pic for comparison.

My friend came out to his family today, I think they had an inkling. by reddit0rialin funny

[–]not_my_normal 0 points1 point ago

You don't want to be straight. We have parades.

My friend came out to his family today, I think they had an inkling. by reddit0rialin funny

[–]not_my_normal 1 point2 points ago

Some people just cannot come to terms with the fact that they don't like the gender they think they do. So they ignore it. They think they just haven't found the right boy/girl to make them feel special, and since it's nearly impossible to accurately describe feelings they don't know for fact that this is wrong. And then, when they notice that they think the "wrong" gender is hot, they just tell themselves they're making an objective observation.

I knew a guy who didn't know he was gay, although I was pretty certain. I just thought he was in the closet, so I asked him out. After our date, I asked him if he had thought it was a date. He hadn't, he had no idea, and he backed away cause "he wasn't into guys." Three years later he came out as bisexual. Two years after that he came out as gay.

The mind is a weird place.

What child names make you instantly lose respect for the parent when you hear it? by KimJongUnoin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 0 points1 point ago

Doesn't mean they're reasonable names. The problem comes with the fact that for most people in America, those names are immediately associated with a geriatric woman. At some point these girls will be teenagers, trying to get dates, and dealing with the fact that every time someone gets introduced to them they get a flash image of an old lady.

What child names make you instantly lose respect for the parent when you hear it? by KimJongUnoin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 0 points1 point ago

When my sister was being born, I was in my teens and used my "familiarity with modern youth culture" to convince them away from any names that would make her life hell.

It was hard work. Every time they came up with a horrible name, I new I would have to spend the next month or so convincing them it would make her life hell.

At they end they settled on Sofia. They refused to spell it Sophia because they thought that would make it more likely for her to get the nickname Sophie, which they didn't like.

So now, everyone just calls her Fifi (or something of the like) instead, which is so much more respectable.

I just watched my dog slip on a banana peel. About peed my pants. What is the funniest thing you've ever seen by Waf-Eltesterin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 0 points1 point ago

I hate to be that guy, but... why is delivery capitalized, but not Digiorno?

I just watched my dog slip on a banana peel. About peed my pants. What is the funniest thing you've ever seen by Waf-Eltesterin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 1 point2 points ago

I've noticed that the solution to dogs doing something stupid and embarrassing themselves is always treats. I realize I also did this when I had a dog.

I think the dogs are actually just really smart and know that by doing something slightly embarrassing, they can be showered in delicious treats that they can't get on their own because they don't have any damn opposable thumbs.

Forget all the great concerts you've been to, what is the WORST concert you've seen? by scadsofemotionin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 1 point2 points ago

This spring break I went home from college and tried to get together with a friend of mine who was still at my old high school. He is essentially the school's main theater tech guy, and said he had a show to tech the only night I could hang out, but that he could get me in for free and we could hang out back stage. I thought it was a school play or something, but it turned out to be this professional show called the "New Seeds Festival," which I think focused on indie women.

Anyway, I get there like half an hour before the show starts and start shooting the breeze with my friend. As show time approaches I notice that there is only one person in the stands. Right when the show starts seven more people take their seats, and I think, "alright, at least it won't be TOO horribly awkward," but then I realize that those seven people were all volunteers for the festival.

There was only one paying audience member.

I ask my friend and he says that for the other shows for this "festival", there have 30 or so people. I was hoping and sort of expecting them to cancel the show with such an abismal turn out, but no. The show must go on.

When the show started, I realized sadly that that one person had given this group more money than they deserved. It was... horrible. First there was a dancer in a wheelchair. Now, I've seen a few amazingly good wheelchair dancers, and that was what I was expecting. But she was not one of them. They said she had gotten a Master's in Dance, but I have to figure everyone just felt sorry for her.

Next was a comedian who had one some comedy competition from her county. She had one good joke, and it was a damn good joke, but her set went on for 20 minutes. The rest of it was horrible. And, of course, even for the good joke, there were only eight people in the audience laughing so it still sounded ultimately depressing.

Next was another dance group which was apparently good, but I missed it to take a very important phone call. Really I just wanted to get out of there.

Finally, it was time for the last act. All the other acts had been less than 30 minutes in length, so I figure we're almost done. Then I look at the set directions for this band, and realize that they're planning on playing an hour long set. The band was okay, played what we in my family call "lesbian folk music," which ended up being a very accurate description when, between songs the lead singer told us her life story of realizing she was a lesbian. When she wasn't telling us that story she was very sadly asking all the people in the audience to bring people to the next night's performance. But she went on for the entire hour, and actually went over, because of all her little rants.

Finally, the lights go up, the tiny round of applause goes out, and my friend looks over at me and mouths, "I'm so sorry."

I just laughed and told him he owed me dinner.

TL;DR: Helped a friend tech a concert where there was only one paying customer, the acts were all terrible, and the final act repeatedly asked everyone involved with the show to please bring friends to the next day's show.

Forget all the great concerts you've been to, what is the WORST concert you've seen? by scadsofemotionin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 13 points14 points ago

I'm confused. Did you marry her or not?

What is the worst advice you've ever received? by sophalopein AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 1 point2 points ago

Have you forgotten that Amy comes from money and was a PhD candidate? Chances are the girl knows how to handle her money.

What's your best "I told you so" story? by thinkofsomethingkwikin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 1 point2 points ago

It is! I can safely assume my parents have never had sex, and this, keep my innocence

What's your best "I told you so" story? by thinkofsomethingkwikin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 0 points1 point ago

artificial insemination.

What's your best "I told you so" story? by thinkofsomethingkwikin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 5 points6 points ago

When I was 10, my family went out to dinner at an Italian restaurant that, like all Italian restaurants, served really large plates of pasta. Well I was a growing boy, so I ate my entire plate of spaghetti and meatballs. My mom, when she saw I had finished my plate, sighed and warned that I would probably have a stomach ache that night. I assured her that would not be a problem. This was a fairly regular exchange between the two of us, sometimes she was right, sometimes she was wrong.

So we went continued on the night, went to a movie. By the end of the movie, I was starting to think that maybe my mom was right. My stomach hurt. But I had had a stomach ache before and I wasn't going to let my mom be right, so I just shut up and carried on.

By the time we got home, my stomach was starting to hurt a lot. Worse than anything I had ever felt before. So I gave in, and told my parents that I had a stomach ache. My mom, whom I had put through this before, sighed and told me to go to bed, she'd get me some water, but there wasn't really anything she could do about it.

I told her that this was no normal stomach ache. There had to be something she could do. She sighed and told me to try to sleep it off. If it was still bad in the morning, we would go to the doctor's.

At around midnight, I'm still in the fetal position, awake, on my bed. Unable to sleep because of the pain, I stumble over to my parent's room and tell them that there must be something wrong. I was almost crying at this point. My parents, sleepily, tell me to try throwing up, see if that helps.

I spent the next two hours going between trying to throw up and shit out the worst pain of my life. I'm completely unsuccessful at my task. At that point, I just curled up around the toilet bowl because having the cool porcelain made my stomach feel a bit better, and stayed like that the rest of the night, crying on and off.

Morning comes, and the pain has subsided enough that I can walk downstairs to find my parents making breakfast. I tell them about what happened the night before, collapsing onto a couch. My mom tells me she wants me to join them for their weekly yoga class. I tell her that is impossible as I'm still in an unusual amount of pain and really think there's something wrong here.

My parents look at each other before sighing and saying that they were going to yoga. If I was still in pain when they got back, they'd take me to the doctor, but they were really sure it was just that I had eaten too much the night before.

I spend the next few hours curled up on the couch trying to watch tv but pretty much just crying in pain.

Finally, my parents come home, find me curled up, and get me in the car to take me to a pediatric clinic. All the way there, my mom is sure that I just ate too much, and I let out a yelp of pain on every bump we go over.

We get to the clinic. The nurse asks whats wrong and I tell her. The nurse pushes against my abdomen in two spots and asks me when it hurts, and I tell her. The nurse runs out to get the doctor who does the same. The doctor immediately turns to my parents and tells them that I needed to get to an OR, fast. My appendix is bursting, and it needs to get taken out.

My mom had her appendix taken out when she was 16, says she should have recognized the signs. My mom's girlfriend at the time was a nurse practitioner, says she should have recognized the signs. If I hadn't been freaking out over the idea of going into a surgery, I would have been telling them "I told you so," all the way to the fucking hospital.

TL;DR: Had appendicitis, parents were sure it was just a stomach ache and so kept putting off getting me checked out by a doctor.

To all redditors in the medical field: What is one thing you wish more patients knew? by Sharkbait_ooh_ah_ahin AskReddit

[–]not_my_normal 1 point2 points ago

As an EMT, we're trained to do this if someone says they're allergic to aspirin, which we give to people who we think are having a heart attack. "Are do you have an allergy to aspirin?"

"Yes."

"...what happens when you take aspirin."

If they what they say are the symptoms of an allergic reaction (hive, trouble breathing, passing out, etc.) then they obviously don't get it.

But a surprising number of people respond with "well it makes my stomach hurt." Well, you know what? That's just what aspirin does to most people. Would you rather have a stomach ache or be dead.

Essentially what I'm trying to say is, I wish people knew the difference between a negative side effect, and an allergic reaction. Lot's of people think if anything other than the desired effect happens when taking a drug, it's "an allergic reaction."

No.

Ask a fucking doctor. Don't just assume for yourself. You don't want to lose a chance to get treated easily just because you're a hypochondriac.

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