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all 68 comments

[–][deleted] 65 points66 points ago

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Also are they trying to take your kid because you're an atheist and not at all a terrible parent who spends all day e-boning weird dudes from reddit instead of caring for your 4-year-old?

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points ago

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No, it's definitely not that.

[–]findler 15 points16 points ago

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Atheism, the secret ingredient to sympathy and upvotes on reddit. Thank god there are still us cynics here to knock everything down a few pegs!

[–]Devenu 29 points30 points ago

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Thank god

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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Atheism, the secret ingredient to sympathy and upvotes on reddit.

And cats.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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Atheism is the secret ingredient to cats?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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I did what you see there

[–]0007000 3 points4 points ago

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Just replying to the top post for the free karma.

Upvotes on your left

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points ago

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lol

[–]Qwuffl 64 points65 points ago

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Exactly what i was thinking.

Also, hurr durr, we pushed some book to top charts, we r teh ultimate power, we can Ron Paul this Carl Sagan with our army of basement dwellers.

[–][deleted] ago

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[deleted]

[–]Qwuffl 21 points22 points ago

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I only wish it would be easier to distinguish /r/circlejerk from other subreddits, it's getting real hard.

Have a nice day anyway.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points ago

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it's getting real hard.

it's getting real hard.

it's getting real hard.

getting real hard

real hard

hard

hard

DIIIIIIIIIICK JOOOOOOOKEEEEEEEEEE

[–]ThrashIt 1 point2 points ago

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Stop with this foolishness and get on with the pun threads! Fucking cancer.

[–]W1nd 2 points3 points ago

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countless times I had to turn my instant downvote into an upvote because these threads felt so real at first glance...

[–]tristamgreen 12 points13 points ago

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we can Ron Paul this Carl Sagan

I want to have passionate unprotected hot monkey sex with this quote.

[–]oddSpace 3 points4 points ago

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WIN THIS upvotes

[–]mhender 7 points8 points ago

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redditorfag got mad at me because i told them a ron paul documentary wouldn't sell out midnight screenings :( the delusion among some of the redditors is insane.

[–]rgonzal 4 points5 points ago

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Comments like these remind me why I haven't quit reddit.

[–]PanickingSkywalker 3 points4 points ago

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Me too.

[–]Qwuffl 1 point2 points ago

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Spread the unretardedness, my friend.

[–]tyrghast 1 point2 points ago

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have my e-babies

[–]IKilledCarlSagan 0 points1 point ago

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Well done.

[–]FeliciaMaria 26 points27 points ago

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HAHA

[–]villin609 43 points44 points ago*

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OMG THIS. HAHAHA

Edit: upvote if you agree!!!

[–][deleted] 37 points38 points ago

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Hahahah...logged in just to say this!!

[–]aedgar777 32 points33 points ago

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LOL set my alarm to get up early this morning just in case something like THIS was posted and could be upvoted. GOD we are so FUNNY. Jk not really a god though.

[–]DaltonMan321 13 points14 points ago

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UPVOTED!

[–]rgonzal 12 points13 points ago

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UPVOTE FOR YOU GOOD SIR

[–]nnotserPx 14 points15 points ago

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HAHAHAH YOU'RE USING THE PHRASE GOOD SIR INFORMALLY EVEN THOUGH IT'S INTENDED TO BE USED FORMALLY

LOLOLOL OMG YOU'RE A FUCKING GENIUS HAHHAHAHLOLO

[–]RADF 5 points6 points ago

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UP "BOAT" HAHAHA

[–]brucemo 17 points18 points ago

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For a few who have asked for links:

Old post.

New post.

TL;DR (yeah, I know this is long, but a lot shorter than all that):

This started when she claimed to have fled her parents house, where she was living, without her car (she claims to have title on the car) or her daughter (she's a 23 year-old single mother of an "almost 4 year old daughter", with a boyfriend and an ex who has visitation rights).

She asked for help getting said car and daughter back, and "GO GET YOUR CHILD NOW" ended up with about 1500 up-votes (has 2000 now). For whatever reason she spent the day not doing that, and this frustrated some people. Her post history included some minor inconsistencies and weirdnesses which led some people to accuse her of being a fraud. Her response to that was to edit her submission to ask people not accuse her of being a fraud, but to PM her instead. This had predictable results.

Going from memory, she's 23, didn't mention having a job, suggested that her parents had been "looking for an excuse" to kick her out, and is living with her grandmother now.

She makes claims of various sorts of abuse via yelling.

She's almost certainly not a fraud, and I'm guessing is not much different from a lot of people in this economy who end up single and with a baby at age 20.

Regarding the details of her life, feel free to guess. There is plenty of opportunity to make fun of her if you are so inclined.

[–]classic91 7 points8 points ago

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Protip, don't get a baby when you can't afford it. It is not a fucking toy or some kinda trophy.

[–]mcf 2 points3 points ago

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But I'm entitled to have promiscuous sex! I'm a millennial! It's the baby boomer's fault for raising me on bad morals!

[–]moediggity -1 points0 points ago

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abortion is there for a reason

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points ago

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So true man. I mean my parents through me out because I was an atheist. I mean man, come on, I spent all day on their computers using their networking connection to post rage comics in /r/atheism about how horrible they were and how much I hate them... stupid fundies. I mean they don't even go to church but they are irrational fundies cuss they like kinda believe in a god or something..

[–]morinkenmar 7 points8 points ago

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Link to original for additional lulz?

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points ago

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[–]brucemo 2 points3 points ago

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See my response to the submitter for links and back-story.

[–]Violent_broccoli 7 points8 points ago

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It's a tough world out there brah. Christians, JW, Mormons, Scientologists waiting at every corner for an opportunity to debate you get your ass. Be sure to get a thick steel front-door and barricade the entire house. Don't forget to prepare a list of witty retorts, in case they manage to get in. These fuckers are well equipped and will spend 24 hours straight to get into your house.

And get this book by R.Dawkins "How to survive on your own with dad paying the rent, while still smoking weed and having mom doing the laundry every weekend -Carl Sagan"

It's on sale on amazon right now.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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I swear /r/circlejerk has increased immensely in quality as the rest of reddit becomes more and more retarded. We should win community of the year for sure.

[–]wellgolly 2 points3 points ago

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The exact second I finally checked out reddit, I hated it to death. But I couldn't stop reading it.

Circlejerk makes me feel way better about spending my time on here.

[–]moediggity 1 point2 points ago

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well the nwa will make sure of that win. its for the greater good.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points ago

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My God, you poor soul. What horrible, bigoted parents you have that they would kick you out because of your beliefs. Sounds like they need to listen to some Carl Sagan.

[–]esnir 3 points4 points ago

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It has come to my attention that you have misspelled "atheist". Your folly shall be your undoing.

[–]rgonzal 3 points4 points ago

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BUY MY SHIT NIGGA

[–]LibertariansLOL 2 points3 points ago

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Just to educate you americans; I live in Sweden, I pay almost exactly 25% income tax (the percentage rises with income, doctors and such (who makes double of what I'm making) pay up to 50% income tax.). And then I pay 25% sales tax on almost everything except food (12%), books (6%), culture like concerts, museums and such (6%).

I'm a high school teacher and make $2.900/month after income tax. I rent an 2 bdr apartment (860 sq ft) in a good neighborhood for $850/month. Gas prices are $8.43/gallon (14.43sek/liter). I have almost free (max cost is $137/year) health care, free education to PhD-level, a social safety net that actually works, 2 year unemployment security (80% of my normal income), almost free (max cost is $275/year) medication. Health and medication is free to the year you turn 20. And I retire when I'm 65.

So, my advice is: you should really pay more taxes. I just came back from a 3w trip in the states, driving from Miami up to N.Y. and I've seen some scary shit. You all say you are the richest country in the world. Let me tell you, you are NOT the richest country in the world. Not even close. I've never seen so much poverty and injustice. You really should take more care of each other. I will keep posting this r/politics tldr until people stop serious replying to it. Your government needs more money because your sick and poor needs more money. And the republicans talk about "cutting down on spending". I say: cutting spending on what? You have seniors working the graveyard shift, people with bad mental health wandering the streets, homeless trying to sell bottled water and a "spit and shine" on the roads etc. Of course, you could stop going to war all the time, but that's apparently not going to happen anytime soon. Your government needs to spend MORE money. And you who can afford it, you should pay more taxes. A lot more.

[–]papajohn56 4 points5 points ago

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wut

[–]walter_sobchak1 0 points1 point ago

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Are you lost?

[–]stanfan114 6 points7 points ago

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Are we making fun of another thread? If so, link it.

[–]brucemo 1 point2 points ago

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My reply to the submitter contains links and back story.

[–]RevRound 5 points6 points ago

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As an atheist, this is right on the dot. I love you circlejerk

[–]rgonzal 31 points32 points ago

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AS A CHRISTIAN I THINK THAT AS A CHRISTIAN I HAVE TO SAY AS A CHRISTIAN BEFORE I SAY THINGS.

[–]sweetafton 15 points16 points ago

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As a surrealist, pineapple rock staircase.

[–]Exocytosis 5 points6 points ago

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As a nigger, bix nood mufugga.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points ago

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Hey, come on now, this is circlejerk. We jerk circles, we aren't racists or anythi - PFFTTHAHA, sorry I couldn't do it.

[–]papajohn56 1 point2 points ago

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mup da doo didda?

[–]HerpthouaDerp 2 points3 points ago

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Orange cider?

[–]sweetafton 2 points3 points ago

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Incredulously!

[–]rgonzal 1 point2 points ago

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herpderp

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points ago

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For being a religion of love, Christians are all merciless unforgiving hypocrites

[–]Frankocean2 5 points6 points ago

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ALL Christians?? that's quite the assumption for someone who loves logic , coherence and preaches (According to our lord Dawkins) that you can be as compassionate as people who believe in God.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points ago

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It's not an assumption, look at all the pictures of Christians being stupid on facebook, and all the Christians I accost everyday are rude to me as well.

[–]Frankocean2 1 point2 points ago

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Not sure if trolling...

Would you say Mr. Rogers was a bad person? probably you admire and love are christians..and some of them are atheists.

So light up.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points ago

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Welcome to r/circlejerk, keep up

[–]Frankocean2 0 points1 point ago

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Funny you said that cuz your here <....... AND IM OVER HERE ----------->

[–]HerpthouaDerp 2 points3 points ago

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We read right to left around here.

[–]Obamaphiles 1 point2 points ago

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THIS! THIS! I CAN'T UPVOTE THIS ENOUGH.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point ago

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BURN THE HERETIC RON PAUL RON PAUL WOOOOOOOOOOOO